I Did It!

Jun. 23rd, 2017 08:21 pm
aximili: (Default)
[personal profile] aximili
I signed up for the Himalayan Trek in October. I'm just going to pay the extra fees to go alone. It's not that bad, and I'll regret not going places because other people couldn't make time. I just have to figure out airfare.

I was thinking about how having a life you are jealous of vs. constantly saving things for later and decided I had to go for it.

I keep thinking about how nice it would be to just have one job but I think I can wait til nursing is done. At the very least I can wait til I'm NOC shift. Then at the very least I can wait til I'm done with online coursework... then the first semester of nursing school... etc.

John Hopkins

Jun. 23rd, 2017 06:55 am
aximili: Rachel Maddow being her quirky self. (Political: Rachel Maddow Funny)
[personal profile] aximili
So, I finally figured out why I couldn't access coursework through the iPad Pro for JHU. Now I've completed the sexual harassment training and signed up for three courses. (It says you can only sign up for two courses, but... It didn't stop me from signing up for three. It did stop me from signing up for Anatomy, but I will worry about that next quarter.)

It may be a moot point, though, because I need to pay $3,150 in order to take all three courses. I may only be able to afford one or two classes the first quarter. Or not - technically, Kevin is supposed to be contributing to rent now, too. But still, ultimately, the second best nursing program in the nation does not come cheap. Still, I want to do it for a few reasons:

1. The online courses buy me some time in which I can work both jobs.
2. I can transfer units I earn at JHU to Stanbridge if I go to school at Stanbridge, which means potentially skipping the whole CNA or LVN program and going straight into the RN program.
3. It lets me avoid making the choice to go to Stanbridge right away, which gives me a chance to work on earning my way into JHU if I decide the way to get away from my dysfunctional family is by moving to Maryland. (Maryland is cheaper, incidentally.)
4. I already wanted to start building up a good GPA there to sign up for an advanced academic program there someday in the future.

I really want to do that Himalayan trek, but I don't think I can afford it and John Hopkins. Unless it becomes a family trip. So I guess I'll have to talk to Dad. He wants to go, but then we don't sign up. Make a choice, dude.

Now I get to sleep for four hours before getting up for work >_>


Jun. 22nd, 2017 12:33 am
aximili: (DP: You and I (Sam to Danny))
[personal profile] aximili
Additional new hobby: going to the free local concerts.

Wonder Woman !!

Jun. 22nd, 2017 03:51 pm
pebblerocker: A worried orange dragon, holding an umbrella, gazes at the sky. (Default)
[personal profile] pebblerocker
The new Wonder Woman movie gave me a lot more than I'd expected was possible - a superhero movie with a woman as the main character, getting most of the screentime and adventures, being a hero - and its downfall was that it showed me I could hope for something WAY BEYOND that. The first half-hour was ALL about women talking to other women and doing amazing superhero moves and having a history and family and friends and working together and riding neat horses, and it was everything I ever wanted; then men turned up and Diana went away from the beautiful sunny islands and spent the rest of the movie surrounded by muddy trenches and rubble and men. I spent the whole movie expecting all the other Amazons to come back into it and they didn't.

Also Steve Trevor spent a LOT of time telling Diana to stop talking and stop doing things because he knew best. The situation of her having no knowledge of the world outside her island could have been handled in a less un-fun way, I think. I can see they were aiming to have it lead up to a Big Scene where she stops listening to him and goes off to do some heroing with dramatic music, but, you know, she's a hero, we know she's gonna hero, it's impressive without having to watch her be squashed down by a man shutting her up over and over for AN HOUR before she gets to do the heroing.

My partner thought there was excessive use of slow motion during the fight scenes. I loved every second of it because I wanted to see a woman being a superhero on the big screen and I wanted to be able to see it happen. Last couple of Marvel superhero movies I've seen, the camera is jiggling around all the time the fight's going on so there's no way to know who's hitting who and it makes me feel a bit seasick so I just look to see who's standing up once the fight scene's over. It's all right with me if the camera lingers for a while on Wonder Woman leaping through the air and looking amazing.

There are no scenes of Wonder Woman being raped or threatened with rape. I thought I'd say because that's something I wanted to know before I went to see it.


Jun. 21st, 2017 01:46 pm
aximili: (P!nk: Eyes)
[personal profile] aximili
So, I talked to Full-Time Job about moving to NOC (overnight) shift Sunday-Thursday. It'll be more of a hassle to First-Job in some ways, but it'll be more convenient in others. (I won't be able to open or close, but I'll be available Saturdays and Sundays.)

I'm seriously considering quitting, though. (First Job, I mean.) I mean, I want both jobs to work out, but... If I'm working 40-48 hours/week and it's not condensed into two days it's going to be really hard. And Full-Time Job overnight is basically like being paid $20/hour to go to school.

I don't have to make any rushed decisions though. Stanbridge costs a lot of money... I'll be saving money for some months. I was going to see about calling them and starting in the fall... But then I realized I wouldn't have the tuition for it.

Uhm, anyway, so. Busy future planned.

Wedded Bliss

Jun. 20th, 2017 02:01 pm
aximili: (TPATF: Fray)
[personal profile] aximili
Having been to that event (it was amazing, but moving on) I really don't think I'd ever want to get married. At least, not in the form of a ceremony. What I'd like to do is find a great person with whom I travel, go out with, enjoy the company of, etc. (And vice versa, obviously) and then we just sign the paperwork and travel as a 'wedding.'

But I'm not going to assume I'll ever meet someone (friends, romantic partners, or otherwise) and instead just live my life the way I want and hope I run into the right people that way. So, things:

+ Travel: Himalayas Trek. I plan on buying a ticket either this paycheck, or two paychecks from now for later this year. That gives me time to save money for the flight.

+ Travel: Egypt tour through archaeological paths! That would be 2018 (I'd do it first - I really want to go to Egypt. But it'll cost a lot more money.)

+ Surf lessons (skateboarding lessons? I want to pick up some new skills.)

+ Camping/Backpacking/Climbing.

+ Nursing/TEFL training.

Uhm, all the stuff I already do, I plan to continue doing. The most important thing is I don't want to continue waiting for other people to do things with. It costs more to do things alone. But it's the things we don't do that we'll regret.
moonplanet: Dutch cover of His Dark Materials book 1, "Het Noorderlicht" by Philip Pullman (Default)
[personal profile] moonplanet
Titel: The world of urban decay 2 (op Librarything, op Hebban.nl, op Goodreads)
Auteur: Martin ten Bouwhuijs
Taal: Engels (ook al is de auteur Nederlands)
Serie: "The world of urban decay" fotoboekenserie van Martin Bouwhuijs
Soort uitgave: hardcover
Aantal pagina's: 176
Uitgever: Schiffer Publishing, Ltd.
Jaar van publicatie: origineel 2017, mijn editie 2017 (1e editie)
ISBN-nummer: 9780764352560
Trefwoorden: foto's, verlaten gebouwen
Waarom ging ik het lezen: Het klonk heel interessant en ik was erg benieuwd naar zulke verlaten locaties hier in Europa.
Aanrader: Ja. Dit boek is vooral interessant voor mensen die willen weten hoe gebouwen eruit gaan zien als ze niet onderhouden worden en voor mensen met een interesse in de Europese geschiedenis van de twintigste eeuw.

Korte samenvatting:
Fotograaf Martin ten Bouwhuijs heeft in dit boek foto's verzameld die hij de afgelopen drie jaar van verlaten gebouwen in Nederland, België, Italië, Duitsland, Frankrijk, Noorwegen, Zweden en Denemarken heeft gemaakt. De staat van vervalling verschilt per gebouw - in sommige zijn de bedden begroeid met mos, terwijl het op sommige foto's lijkt alsof het gebouw pas net verlaten is en het bureau nog vol ligt met papier. Vanwege instortingsgevaar is het vaak verboden om dit soort gebouwen te bezoeken, dus Martin beschrijft af en toe ook wat er gebeurde bij zijn pogingen om foto's te maken.

Eastern and Western Europe's many forgotten buildings and abandoned lots greet visitors most often with a warning: "Trespassers will be prosecuted!" And yet, for intrepid urban explorers, the appeal is clear. Photographer Martin ten Bouwhuijs takes readers inside these imposing, seemingly lifeless structures - some abandoned for more than 25 years - including churches, mortuaries, factories, hospitals, swimming pools, and more. Unaffected by human interference for years, these spaces have become wonders of beautiful, natural decay: moss grows on mattresses and cars, wallpaper peels, and floors - complete with beds, pianos, and the detritus of human existence - utterly collapse. These images, the result of daring photographic escapades, bring a new appreciation for the beautiful architecture and the awe-inspiring grandeur of times past. Surreal perspectives - the bottom of a stairwell in a vacant sanatorium, an unsupervised Swedish junkyard, and more - as well as arresting, sensually provocative images will appeal to those already hooked on the beauty of urban decay as well as history buffs, photography collectors, and anyone who appreciates contemplating the ever-changing intersection between man and nature.

Eerste alinea van de "Introduction":
As a child I grew up in Enschede, in the Netherlands. I started taking photographs with my father's SLR camera - mainly, pictures of trucks. At that time, Enschede had a lot of abandoned textile mills. I was always curious about what the interios of the factories would look like after several years of emptiness, but I never dared to go inside, partly because of the signs that announced "trespassers will be prosecuted." Still, I followed with interest the demolition of almost all the plants.

Na een korte introductie volgen vele pagina's met foto's. Elke pagina bevat een grote foto waarop genoeg details te zien zijn, met onder elke foto maximaal twee regels tekst. Achterin staat per locatie een iets uitgebreidere beschrijving.

Op de "Acknowledgements"-pagina vooraan staat nog wel een belangrijke alinea: "To protect the locations in this book, their names, the names of the villages and all other names, as well as years and other information that could lead to a specific location, are changed."
Dit is gedaan omdat het bezoeken van zulke locaties wel riskant is en de uitgever en auteur geen aansprakelijkheid nemen voor mogelijke ongelukken, maar hierdoor zijn de bijschriften bij de foto's heel algemeen: "Grand Hotel, Austria" of "Villa S, Italy". Alleen locaties die niet meer bestaan of zijn/worden omgebouwd, lijken bij hun echte naam en locatie te worden genoemd. Deze plaatsen kun je toch niet meer bezoeken.
Het is begrijpelijk dat de auteur en uitgever deze keuze hebben gemaakt en het doet niets af aan de foto's, maar dit maakt het wel lastiger om meer informatie te vinden over de locaties, mocht je dat willen doen.

De meeste gebouwen zijn in de jaren '90 verlaten, een aantal in de jaren '80 en ook nog een paar in de jaren 2000. Ook staan er een aantal foto's in van oude auto's uit de jaren '50 en '60 van de vorige eeuw, genomen op een Zweeds autokerkhof.
Veel gebouwen lijken helemaal niet zo lang geleden gebouwd te zijn, maar toch vervalt zo'n gebouw heel snel als er niets meer mee gedaan wordt. Dit geeft het boek wel een beetje deprimerende sfeer.

Er staat zelfs een foto in van een verlaten ziekenhuiskamer in Denemarken, inclusief mappen, papieren, Post-It-blokjs, een pen en een faxapparaat. Je vraagt je vaak af waarom zo'n gebouw precies verlaten is en in wat voor omstandigheden dit gebeurd is. Bij de uitgebreide beschrijvingen achterin het boek, wordt voor een aantal locaties antwoord gegeven op deze vragen.

De reden dat het boek in het Engels is geschreven, ook al is de auteur Nederlands, is waarschijnlijk omdat de foto's in verschillende landen in Europa genomen zijn en een Engels boek natuurlijk ook in meer landen te verkopen is. Bij de foto's zelf staat amper tekst, maar achterin, bij de uitgebreide beschrijvingen, staat wel veel tekst. Soms leken de zinnen "Nederlands Engels", maar alles is goed te begrijpen.

Bladzijde 7:
But these building are also affected by great changes in the world. =
But these buildings are also affected by great changes in the world.

Bladzijde 173:
Er staat "kilometer", maar het is misschien beter om daar "kilometre" van te maken. "Kilometer" is de Amerikaanse spelling, maar "kilometre" is de internationale spelling.

Dit boek gaat natuurlijk over de afbeeldingen. Binnenin staan alleen foto's van de binnenkanten van de gebouwen, maar de achterkaft heeft foto's van de buitenkanten van de gebouwen waarvan binnenin het boek interieurfoto's staan.

De foto's in dit boek geven een goed beeld van wat er met gebouwen gebeurd als ze niet onderhouden worden. Het lezen van de beschrijvingen geeft ook te denken over wat "modern" is en waarvoor gebouwen gebruikt worden als zulke dingen niet meer modern zijn, omdat een aantal gebouwen in dit boek vaak van functie zijn veranderd.

Als je de foto's voor een tweede keer bekijkt, zie je weer wat andere dingen dan de eerste keer. Het zijn echter zo veel foto's, dat het geen boek is om in één keer geheel door te kijken en lezen.

- Een aantal foto's uit het boek op de site van de auteur.
- Deze recensie op Hebban.nl
- Deze recensie op Goodreads.


Jun. 18th, 2017 06:20 pm
aximili: (Animorphs: Marco Ditch School)
[personal profile] aximili
So, I didn't realize it, but Patrick married into money.

This thing was massively expensive. And the wife's father is low-key famous. Like. The cab driver knew who the father was by name.

I'm not sure where Patrick stands on all of that personally - I think he does pretty well for himself - but like.

I would have brought very different clothes if I had known XD

Give, Take

Jun. 17th, 2017 12:18 pm
aximili: (Default)
[personal profile] aximili
I'm having fun seeing Patrick but that aside it's all way too much socializing and conforming and dressing up for me personally. I'm exhausted.

Also I had lots of nightmares last night (I can't remember specifically what since I didn't dwell on it.) I had lots of REM sleep though...
aximili: (Corpse Bride: Emily Proper)
[personal profile] aximili



Jun. 15th, 2017 01:38 am
aximili: Me (Nature: Baby Gator)
[personal profile] aximili
So, we actually have a fair amount of work tonight - editing forms, making new forms, taking in inventory. Way easier to stay awake when there is stuff to do (it can be self-made stuff or work, either way. But because of everything going on there's not been a lot of either.)

One of the director's most valued client care specialists has sort of taken me under her wing for training. But they now want me to move to overnight every night of the week. That would mean eight more hours a week, but it would also mean double shifts most days of the week... Unless I leave Ralphs. Ugh.


Jun. 14th, 2017 05:22 am
aximili: (Megamind: He was too fantastic.)
[personal profile] aximili
Okay so. I have to budget for everything going on. I think I have to assume this month is going to be over-budget. Patrick's wedding will involve a lot of spending (wedding gift, probably a gift for Cassidy.)

I also think I will finally replace my camera (since I have the funds to do so) so I can take photos of all these shenanigans.

I'll get my hair trimmed (not styled - that can be another adventure, another day) but I think I will do the manicure/pedicure and try to bring along outfits on the nicer side of my wardrobe, since there will be lots of photos. (Though that does make me want to spend the money on hair-styling too.)

Basically, I'm mostly reeling it in on spending, but this month might be a wash because of the unusual event taking place.

Busy Night

Jun. 14th, 2017 01:28 am
aximili: Dash icon saying something. (MLP: Here's what I think)
[personal profile] aximili
Andromida wouldn't let me leave early so I could get to work at the other job on time (I'd already told them I was scheduled til midnight. So, I had permission to come late, but was trying to avoid it.)

I don't get the point of keeping me there. It was completely dead the last 1-1.5 hours. It's something where I'd understand if it had been busy, or if I was trying to leave work early to go out. But. I was trying to get to another job.

Because the center is almost full now, we have to keep one person upstairs and one person downstairs at all times. So I'm upstairs. I figured I was being nice, because downstairs has all the couches, but then again, that means my co-worker has to check the bags for contraband.

I'm so excited about having a week off. I'm excited to meet my niece, and to see my brother again. I'm thinking about even getting my hair styled. It's something I've never done before.

Uhm. Anyway. As excited as I am, I still need to get through tonight.

I've not been on DuoLingo in too long

Jun. 13th, 2017 12:38 am
aximili: (Yes Man: Zooey Bite)
[personal profile] aximili
I went and did an exercise today and it turns out they have advertisements each lesson now - and they don't offer an ad-free option!

Well, if I'm paying in one form or another anyway, why the heck would I use DuoLingo over Rosetta Stone? So, now, I'm back to using Rosetta Stone exclusively.

We have a co-worker who is terminally ill and she was crying a lot today. I tried to offer her food (I'm not great at offering emotional support, plus I think emotional support can be counter-productive when you're trying to work) and then I asked her if she wanted to go Sky-diving.

So, now I need to take Amanda, this co-worker, and I imagine Tigger sky-diving (I'm so-so with Tigger, but he and Amanda get on really well.)

I'm going to invite this co-worker to more things. I don't want to let her isolate herself. Isolation leads to bad places, it tends to feed into more bad shit. Support and connection.

ETA: $600 for four people. I should buy a gift certificate every-other-week, so we can all go in July.

ETA II: Wait, do I need to invite Debbie, Tyler, Alicia and a few other people too? Well shit. Okay, rule of thumb is, pay for person going through Major Life Shit as well as a +1 for them. Anyone else can pay their own way.

Still a Tough Day

Jun. 12th, 2017 01:25 am
aximili: Rachel Maddow jumping and happy. (Political: Rachel Maddow Jump)
[personal profile] aximili
(I'm aware the last post has a typo in the title.)

So, today has been a lot of crying on my part. Seems like everything's normal most of the time, then I remember Selena's gone (usually because some jackass reminds me) and I start crying.

As a side-effect of that, I'm even more exhausted than simply from only sleeping four collective hours the last two days because people keep waking me up. I was feeling fine earlier, but now I'm starting to drag. I wish I could be allowed to sleep a portion of the shift - call it extenuating circumstances, since I have four double-shift days instead of two.

No matter. I'm going to keep busy so I don't fall asleep.

My emotions about Selena are very cyclical. I know we couldn't keep her any longer given her behavioral problem. But she's been there through everything.

I also feel just completely ridiculously stupid. Karen's mother died and she had to work through it. Amanda's best friend and roommate died, and she had to work through it. I relinquish my cat - I don't even euthanize her, just relinquish her - and I'm a total mess.

I've started to stop specifically altering behavioral patterns to avoid seeing Jordan. What I mean is, I don't avoid Subway anymore because it's past the place where he works now. I like getting a sandwich before work at the overnight place, since I'm not supposed to leave for lunch. (You can still bet your ass I don't look at all inside where he works now.)

One of his co-workers came by to buy beer for him. I laughed, at least internally. We'll apparently never stop avoiding each other.

Touch Choices

Jun. 11th, 2017 01:19 pm
aximili: Aang, Sokka, Katara being chased by the fire nation. (Avatar TLA: Trio AAAAH!)
[personal profile] aximili
I finally went ahead and surrendered Selena to a place where she'll be a barn cat. It's a decision we've needed to make a long time. I'm glad we found an alternative that didn't involve euthanizing her.

The clinic was really non-judgmental about it and said that in cases like the one I had less than 3% of cats get their behavior altered to a point where they can be indoor cats. They really understood we had tried every option, A-Z, and we'd been putting up with it for thirteen years and just didn't have the money or stamina for it anymore.

We weren't allowed to know where she goes or make contact with her, though. We just signed a relinquishment form and paid the fee, and that was that. She's no longer ours. She's a barn cat.

I'm going to stop by work early and ask if I can be more useful to them if I clock in early and leave early, since my other job called me in. I got permission from the director to come in late (I'm scheduled til midnight at First Job) but they hardly ever need me til midnight. They may very well let me clock in early and leave early.

First Tinder message apparently didn't go well - the mutual like was gone by the next morning. I think I just jumped into hiking talk. Maybe they thought I was looking for something too serious for them - but I'm not, lol. I don't want a relationship. I would like to meet people where we can also hike and do outdoor/adventurous activities together.

Tinder Anxiety

Jun. 11th, 2017 12:17 am
aximili: (MLP: Ewww)
[personal profile] aximili
Okay. I've done enough moping and work-a-holic-ing the last few months. I've signed up for the CNA course. I've gotten back into running and fitness.

I'm trying to get out more. So, I'm starting to try to get back into MeetUp, I have started doing things through Groupon. And I'm starting to look into trying to meet people again.

I'm not into clubbing, I'm more into outdoor activities. Photography. Writing, art, reading. I wish I were more into clubbing and dancing and parties, since people who are into that stuff seem so happy, but...

No, never mind. That stuff doesn't make me happy. What I do is see people gravitate those people, and I experience envy. I just wish I knew how to make good connections with other introverts.

Anyway, moving on from that: Mutual like on Tinder. What first message should I craft?!

I'm still nervous about everything meeting people tends to entail. But. I do want to make more friends with people who look like they're into the same stuff I am.

Nice things

Jun. 10th, 2017 09:58 am
cesy: "Cesy" - An old-fashioned quill and ink (Default)
[personal profile] cesy
I had a lovely time at [personal profile] kaberett's place last night. We had vegetarian toad-in-the-hole and vegetables and fancy tart and lemon-and-mint cordial and it was delicious. And we watched the first episode of Korra, and I would love to watch more on Rabb.it with people if anyone is up for that. And we talked wheelchairs and other mobility aids and I tried out theirs and it was really helpful. And the political situation is not nearly as bad as either of us were expecting, so that's good.
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